Five Essential Mantras for the Busy Parent-Preneur
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Chapter 1: Understanding the Challenge
Navigating the complexities of being a parent while managing entrepreneurial responsibilities can be overwhelming. I truly grasped this reality one Saturday morning when I found myself deeply engrossed in my work, unaware of my three-year-old son waking up nearby. Suddenly, the door swung open, startling me, and my son asked, "Mama, why are you always working?" His words resonated deeply, prompting me to reflect on the balance—or lack thereof—in my life.
A month prior, I interviewed my mentor, Ayodeji Awosika, who candidly shared the struggles of being present with his child amid his busy schedule. He expressed how challenging it was to disconnect from work, often finding his child in front of the TV instead of spending quality time together. This conversation, coupled with my son’s innocent question, made me consider how many children might feel neglected because their parents are often preoccupied.
This realization pushed me to contemplate the notion of work-life balance and the potential impact on my parenting, especially if I expanded my coaching program. Here are five mantras I’ve developed that may help you if you find yourself in a similar situation.
Section 1.1: Rethink Balance
Rather than striving for a perfect work-life balance, I propose flipping the scale. The term "work-life balance" gained traction as society recognized the need for harmony between professional and personal lives, especially in dual-income households. Yet, for entrepreneurs, longer work hours are sometimes unavoidable.
I've learned to release the guilt of not achieving this balance. Instead of fixating on equilibrium, I focus on prioritizing either my parenting or my work at different times. This flexibility helps me be more effective and present in both roles, rather than spreading myself thin.
Section 1.2: Schedule Quality Time
Opt for quality over quantity when it comes to family time. Children value the quality of interactions more than the sheer amount of time spent together. To ensure I’m mentally and physically present, I now schedule dedicated time with my son.
As an entrepreneur, my mind is perpetually active, juggling multiple roles. By intentionally blocking time for my son, I trick my mind into being present. Initially, I thought it was odd to schedule time with him, but given my own childhood experiences, I’m committed to being there for him.
Subsection 1.2.1: Importance of Routine Moments
Daily tasks, often viewed as insignificant—like making breakfast or folding clothes—can foster strong bonds with children. While it's easy to feel guilty for not spending enough time together, I find joy in these routine activities. The small, everyday moments contribute significantly to a child's emotional development.
Chapter 2: Managing Expectations
We all carry expectations, whether self-imposed or societal. Yael Schonbrun, in her book "Work Parent Thrive," highlights how these pressures can lead to burnout, impacting both work and family life. To combat this, I regularly reassess my expectations to ensure they align with my values and goals.
If my expectations become misaligned, it signals time to step back and simplify my commitments, whether in parenting or work.
Section 2.1: Redefining Rest
Rest does not simply mean lying down; it can involve switching tasks. Engaging in different activities—like teaching my son to ride a bike or taking a walk—serves as a refreshing break. As Alex Soojung-Kim Pang points out in his book, "Rest," work and rest are partners; mastering the art of rest enhances productivity.
By stepping away from my work to engage with my son, I find genuine rejuvenation, allowing me to return to my tasks with renewed energy.
Adding It All Up
Ultimately, a child's sense of security stems from a parent's presence. Strong connections lead to secure attachments, positively influencing a child's social development and independence. I hope these five mantras empower you to be more present in your parenting journey.
You can subscribe to my Newsletter to continue strengthening your connection with your child and enhance your parenting experience.
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