Step 1: Embrace Acceptance

Before you can effectively use someone's pronouns, it’s essential to embrace the idea that their pronouns are valid and worthy of respect. It's impossible to approach this journey from a mindset of negativity or discrimination, such as transphobia. Once you accept the individual for who they are, you can begin the process of learning.

Step 2: Ensure Clarity

The next step is to confirm that you are using the correct pronouns. Whether they prefer she/her, he/him, they/them, or neo-pronouns, checking in with the individual is essential. A simple question like, "Are these your correct pronouns?" can provide the clarity needed to proceed effectively.

Step 3: Engage in Practice

Now comes the enjoyable part—practicing the pronouns. It can be beneficial to practice in front of a mirror, either by addressing the person directly in your mind or forming sentences that incorporate their pronouns. For example, you might say, “They are fantastic.” Adapt your sentences to fit the preferred pronouns. Remember, adjusting to new pronouns takes time, so be patient with yourself as you make this transition.

Step 4: Avoid Excessive Apologies

If you mistakenly use the wrong pronouns during a conversation, it's important not to over-apologize or make the situation uncomfortable. Instead, simply correct yourself and move on. Everyone makes mistakes, and it's perfectly acceptable.

Step 5: Show Respect

The final step is to consistently respect someone's pronouns. Each individual understands their identity best, so allow them to guide you. When asked about a friend or family member’s pronouns, always use the ones they have provided and refrain from making assumptions. If someone chooses not to disclose their pronouns, that decision should also be respected. Celebrate their journey and individuality.

This guide serves as an introductory framework for understanding pronouns, but it's far from exhaustive. I encourage you to have open discussions with those in your life about pronouns and their significance. The more we normalize pronoun usage and view it as a natural part of identity rather than a trend, the smoother our interactions will be.

The Importance of a Safe, Inclusive Environment

The first video, "Using Pronouns to Support a Safe, Welcoming, and Inclusive Environment," highlights the significance of creating spaces where individuals feel respected and acknowledged for who they are.

Emphasizing Respect in Teaching and Learning

The second video, "Gender Pronouns, Teaching and Learning, & Cultures of Respect," discusses the role of education in fostering a culture of respect surrounding gender pronouns.